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Home→Tags validation - Page 6 << 1 2 … 4 5 6 7 >>

Tag Archives: validation

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Healing Frustrations: The Essay

Al Turtle's Relationship Wisdom Posted on August 16, 2005 by Al TurtleJune 3, 2017  

I believe that Frustrations are the critical element to making progress in a Relationship. Healing Frustrations is the key. I call it the ?ratchet? process because , like a ratchet wrench, it makes things move forward and you can?t back up. The following essay contains what I see as the background for dealing with frustrations. It clears up a lot of misunderstandings and can help you stop wasting time and energy in doing things that do not work.

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Posted in Healing the Past | Tagged dialogue, essay, fault, feelings, make sense, peace, point of view, pulling, safety, trust, validation | Leave a reply

Validation: The Skill and the Art

Al Turtle's Relationship Wisdom Posted on July 20, 2005 by Al TurtleOctober 11, 2022 5

When we listen, do we understand? When we speak, do we get to feel understood? The skills of understanding, making a person feel understood, and speaking so that someone can understand you, are very important. In this article I hope to be able to explain about this and start you on your way. Seek to become an expert. I think this is really worth the investment.

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Posted in Diversity, Reliable Membership | Tagged boundary, codependency, codependent, dialogue, feelings, Imago, make sense, mirroring, point of view, pulling, safety, share, trust, validation | 5 Replies

Are You a Controller? Sure you are.

Al Turtle's Relationship Wisdom Posted on June 29, 2005 by Al TurtleAugust 30, 2022  

Probably about 70% of couples I see have a significant problem with controlling. What is this? How does it work? What can you do about it? In this article I will try to answer those questions and share solutions with you.

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Posted in Autonomy | Tagged dialogue, fault, feelings, master-slave, mastertalk, mirroring, narcisism, peace, safety, share, trust, validation | Leave a reply

The Logic of Power Differentials: Heirarchy and Dialogue

Al Turtle's Relationship Wisdom Posted on June 14, 2005 by Al TurtleJune 16, 2019 4

I am presenting this paper as a discussion of dialogue norms to use in Power Differential Relationships. My goal is to re-approach One-up/One-down situations from the relational model, the dialogical model that is central to Imago Relationship theory and practice.
The paper is divided into three sections:
1. Types of Power Differential Situations
2. Decision Making as the legitimate reason for Power Differential Situations
3. The Four Challenges facing groups trying to make decisions.

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Posted in Diversity, Peace Building, Reliable Membership | Tagged affair, boundary, dialogue, feelings, Imago, master-slave, mastertalk, mirroring, narcisism, passivity, peace, point of view, pulling, safety, share, trust, validation | 4 Replies

Caring Days: The Skill

Al Turtle's Relationship Wisdom Posted on April 12, 2005 by Al TurtleApril 12, 2005 6

One important issue that all couples face is making things fair and keeping them that way. I believe things are fair when two people both believe they are fair. When either thinks it's not fair, then it isn't. Takes only one for unfairness, and it takes two for it to be fair.

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Posted in Safety and Trust | Tagged dialogue, feelings, Imago, mirroring, safety, share, trust, validation | 6 Replies

Story: Are you trying to love and not getting anywhere?

Al Turtle's Relationship Wisdom Posted on April 5, 2005 by Al TurtleSeptember 25, 2012 1

I learn a lot from the men in my men’s group. We talk of safety and validation all the time. Here is a story about wasting your energy on the wrong stuff – loving in a way that doesn't work.

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Posted in Diversity, Stories | Tagged feelings, peace, safety, trust, validation | 1 Reply

Excellent Boundaries

Al Turtle's Relationship Wisdom Posted on March 24, 2005 by Al TurtleJuly 7, 2023 6

Several years ago, I was asked during a class, “How do you know that you have a great relationship?” I found myself mentioning four attributes – one was “excellent boundaries.” Someone then asked, “How would you recognize excellent boundaries? What are their indicators?” I thought about that for several weeks. I came up with a list. I have found this list quite provocative.

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Posted in Boundaries, Reliable Membership | Tagged boundary, dialogue, feelings, Imago, make sense, mirroring, share, validation | 6 Replies

Being Dialogical: Sharing

Al Turtle's Relationship Wisdom Posted on March 24, 2005 by Al TurtleSeptember 25, 2012  

I want share my beliefs that being “dialogical” very much involves choices of what to share, when to share it, and acute clarity about boundaries. One choice is the “to share or not to share” choice. Another is the “when to share and when not to share” choice. And another is the “how to share” choice.

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Posted in Communication, Diversity | Tagged boundary, dialogue, feelings, mirroring, point of view, safety, share, trust, validation | Leave a reply

Diversity and PreValidation: The Essay

Al Turtle's Relationship Wisdom Posted on March 20, 2005 by Al TurtleSeptember 6, 2022 5

This is the lesson I teach every person I see. This is critical information for people who are puzzled, bothered, or upset when they find they disagree or that others disagree with them.

These concepts are vital to the practice of Dialogue and Communologue.

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Posted in Diversity | Tagged dialogue, essay, feelings, make sense, master-slave, mastertalk, mirroring, point of view, safety, share, validation | 5 Replies

Directions to Go

Al Turtle's Relationship Wisdom Posted on March 18, 2005 by Al TurtleFebruary 7, 2019 6

A listing of possible relationship problems – linked to solutions.

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Posted in Diversity, Main Page, Map of Relationships, Reliable Membership | Tagged affair, boundary, essay, feelings, make sense, master-slave, safety, trust, validation | 6 Replies

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