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Home→Categories Main Page→Relationships→Skills→Healing the Past

Category Archives: Healing the Past

Phone Chat: On Frustrations

Al Turtle's Relationship Wisdom Posted on April 5, 2007 by Al TurtleApril 5, 2007 2

Yesterday I gave a chat to a group (about 32) of Imago Therapists on Frustrations. Here is that audiofile of that chat. It is about 1 hour long.

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Posted in Healing the Past | Tagged Imago | 2 Replies

Making Amends

Al Turtle's Relationship Wisdom Posted on November 16, 2006 by Al TurtleSeptember 25, 2012 10

Use this process when you want to apologize for something you have done. Its a way to say "I'm sorry" that works.

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Posted in Healing the Past, Skills | Tagged dialogue, fault, feelings, mirroring, share, validation | 10 Replies

Restructuring Frustration: The Form

Al Turtle's Relationship Wisdom Posted on July 25, 2006 by Al TurtleJuly 25, 2006  

Print this form and use a copy in learning and practicing the healing process called Restructuring Frustrations. Restructuring Frustration Form

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Posted in Healing the Past | Leave a reply

Restructuring Frustration: The Process

Al Turtle's Relationship Wisdom Posted on December 9, 2005 by Al TurtleOctober 1, 2016 1

This article is the result of 10 years of practice by my wife and I. It is a step by step structured process that will eventually both remove all critical frustrations from a relationship but will also build confidence and skills in dealing with new frustrations when they arise.

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Posted in Healing the Past | Tagged dialogue, fault, feelings, make sense, mirroring, pulling, safety, share, trust, validation | 1 Reply

Behavior Change Requests (BCRs)

Al Turtle's Relationship Wisdom Posted on August 17, 2005 by Al TurtleAugust 17, 2005  

I really like being efficient. Doing something over and over that doesn?t work seems an utter waste to me. Thus Behavior Change Requests (BCRs) are for me wonderful. How many times have I asked myself, ?Specifically, what can I do to make things better?? and gotten no answer. I used to think on my gravestone they would write, ?He tried.? Now, I think they might write, ?He did it.? I love finding out WHAT WORKS! (This article is part of the Healing Frustrations paper.)

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Posted in Healing the Past | Tagged dialogue, feelings, Imago, mirroring, passivity, pulling, safety, share, trust, validation | Leave a reply

Healing Frustrations: The Essay

Al Turtle's Relationship Wisdom Posted on August 16, 2005 by Al TurtleJune 3, 2017  

I believe that Frustrations are the critical element to making progress in a Relationship. Healing Frustrations is the key. I call it the ?ratchet? process because , like a ratchet wrench, it makes things move forward and you can?t back up. The following essay contains what I see as the background for dealing with frustrations. It clears up a lot of misunderstandings and can help you stop wasting time and energy in doing things that do not work.

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Posted in Healing the Past | Tagged dialogue, essay, fault, feelings, make sense, peace, point of view, pulling, safety, trust, validation | Leave a reply

Frustrations: A Chart

Al Turtle's Relationship Wisdom Posted on August 16, 2005 by Al TurtleAugust 16, 2005  

This is a chart that goes with the Healing Frustrations essay. I share this with anyone in a group or in my office who is trying to understand how to approach Frustrations.

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Posted in Healing the Past | Tagged essay | Leave a reply

Resentments: Getting Rid of Them

Al Turtle's Relationship Wisdom Posted on March 17, 2005 by Al TurtleAugust 8, 2013 21

This paper discusses the issue of Resentment that from time to time becomes an important issue in couples or between groups of people. It includes suggestions on how to remove the resentment. I believe this cannot be done, passively, by waiting. Resentment does not seem to go away by letting time pass. I believe resentment only goes away via the use of validation, and dialogue.

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Posted in Diversity, Healing the Past, Reliable Membership, Solving Problems | Tagged boundary, dialogue, fault, feelings, Imago, mirroring, passivity, pulling, safety, share, trust, validation | 21 Replies

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