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To Imago Therapists — 3 Comments

  1. Pingback:To Imago Therapists | Al Turtle’s Relationship Wisdom | Psyberspace

  2. Good thinking, JRS. I do think it is a strong temptation for people who have expertise or who think they do. Of course I am thinking mostly of relationships, long-term love, bonded relationship. I do find that “experts” have much more trouble than “non-experts” with having intimate relationships. I call it “degrees of difficulty”, suggesting that the more degrees (tokens of expertise) you have, the more intimacy may elude you.
    Still the issue for me is one of training. I think it is easier to teach a kid to be dialogical than to teach them MasterTalk. (I recall years ago in teaching Mathematics, that kids can grasp the concept of > or < (greater than or less than) much more easily than the concept of = (equal). Yet I, as a kid was taught "equal" first and foremost. For us older people, I think the issue is "retraining."

  3. Al: I think “experts” have to really love someone a lot, maybe equal or more than yourself, to resist the urge at first to use Master Talk. Some will have a harder time than others: advanced degrees, military etc. These will find it hard to resist Master Talk.
    The Lizard and Mammalian brains have been trained to take a backseat to the fallacy of “expertise” (Master Talk). Although at work it is ok and even preferred to have “expertise,” it can be death to “Reliable Membership.” Just my thoughts weeks after I killed reliable membership in a long distance relationship.

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