HomeMain PageRelationshipsSkillsFeelings and EmotionsFeelings and Emotions: The Essay, Part Three, Energetics, The Flow of Feelings & Depression

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Feelings and Emotions: The Essay, Part Three, Energetics, The Flow of Feelings & Depression — 9 Comments

  1. Pingback:Anger – Triggers (Part 3) | HEAL & GROW for ACoAs

  2. I think I'm having difficulty seperating the two meanings of validation and approval, or do you think I'm just getting caught up in the semantics of those words?
    I guess I learned from my mom to be a pleaser, to a fault. (for example, at dinner, she will ask me 4 more times if I'm sure I dont want any more mashed potatoes, after I declined the first time. Stuff like that)
    It seems like I have a very high need for approval or validation or whatever in order to keep my confidence going and elevate my self worth, which seems to ebb and flow from inflated sense of self worth to desperate and clingy throughout the course of one day.
    I tend to withdraw from society, because I'm not sure how to reliably interact with people. I guess I'm scared to share myself for the risk of ridicule. I think I have an overactive imagination, hence very random, otherworldly thoughts.
    I suppose I'm also wondering how to find my 'default mode" of confidence and selfworth. Like you said, A person with good self- esteem will like themselves when noone else around them is happy with them. I think that is where I'm confused, because don't you need those people's approval in order to build your confidence? It sounds like I might be mixing up a few of your theories.
    Anyway, thank you for taking the time to answer my questions.
    Sincerely, Johnny

    • I was reading your bit and thinking of Self-Esteem.  There's lots about it on my website.  You might get a kick out of #3 in this short article.

      Keep reading.  My guess is the set of papers on Master/slave and Passivity, etc. would be helpful. 

      We all gotta find a way to build and keep self-esteem.  Self-Esteem – a durable tendency to like and admire yourself for what you do, for what you are, even when others actively dislike you.  Tis a matter of Validation I believe.

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