Hi Al, Thanks for replying and suggesting that book - I will have a look. After waving the white flag, and retreating to lick my wounds I am still working tirelessly on myself - I want to enjoy life and not let this make me bitter! I still very much want to achieve the biological dream, and now accept that perhaps he is not the one - so I am planning things for me. Al I have been thinking lately about 'love' and how we (men and women) all seem to have different ideas about it. What stimulated this thought was that my spouse has said to me a couple of times now that he 'loves me but is not in love with me'. When I asked him did he mean that he doesn't feel that romantic love (or infatuation, or that passionate rush and so on) he said no, and that I just didn't understand. I said that to me love was about all those things, but also still loving someone with all their strengths, weaknesses, flaws, etc. and through the good and bad times was what it was all about. But he only replied with that sentence again! I also remembered reading some of your thoughts on love in one of your essays (can't remember which one). Have you more thoughts on love or perhaps doing an essay? regards kez