That is cool. You know why! Changing your "attraction" into a healthy pattern of behavior is ahead of you. Chat with a counselor or someone who is used to helping people change. Also I think you will find that "why" you are attracted already contains the "how" of changing it. The gold is in the problem, as I have learned. I am not trying to be obtuse. What would you have learned about strong and powerful people, about being strong and powerful yourself, if you had been raised by firm, gentle, respectful people? I don't know your "why," but the usual reason is that you don't experience enough power in your life so you find someone with power. The lesson is to learn to be plenty powerful yourself, w/o the tragedies that come with being over-powerful. I'm not sure what to add. Good luck. Al