Al Turtle's Relationship Wisdom

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Re: Re: Getting to Work
by Al Turtle
Dear AV, Yup, sounds normal to me :) I can hear some things you might be missing and I imagine some skills you need. You've got that bit about him reacting to you as if you were his mother, etc. You might be missing that you are probably reacting to him as if he were --hell, your mom or dad or both. Also, I hear you noticing that he misreads you, fanticizing that he is doing your thinking. Well, it takes quite some training to notice that you are not so much listening to him as interpreting him. Goes both ways. I think it is wonderful to a) notice what my partner is thinking as being her thinking and b) also notice my interpretations of her words as something completely different and mostly about me. Ah well. So maybe you could start with my Map of Relationships, then work on the essays that come out of the Biological Dream. Build them skills! I hear that huge level of frustration. I've had it. The mistake I used to make is that I would blame my partner for my frustration. Really dumb thinking I used to do. If I am frustrated, it is my doing. Better check out my paper on Healing Frustrations and on Boundaries. Good luck.
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