Great question. Learning to use TimeOuts correctly involves lots of trial and error. Glad you are working on it, Lisal. The sound of your question, to me, is that you were not taking a TimeOut at all, but were threatening him in an effort to make him talk with you. Sounds kind of pushy. I'm pretty familiar with this as I used to be really pushy. Boy, that doesn't work! TimeOuts are to provide "safety valves," a break in time in a relationship so that you can stop panic driven interactions and increase thoughtful problem solving time. While panic often arises when an unsolved issue is around, panic will never solve the issue, I believe. Thus a TimeOut is always for a period of time (2 hrs, overnight, a week). I've never used one until someone does something. I think, the way you wrote it, sounds a bit like bullying. Not sure. Let me know if it worked? That said, I suggest you look at the whole issue of Reliable Membership and the Testicle Principle to wrap your thoughts around the problem of "pushing people." I believe it is vital to discuss, dialogue about issues, but I never got there by being pushy. The trick, I've learned, is to come across as "inviting." Anyway, that is what comes to mind, reading your query.