Favorite Which Essays are Popular? (Updated April 8, 2018)


Still going up, gotta change directions.

People are taking the time to read, download, and hand out my articles – over 134,000 readers in the past year. This is pretty powerful stuff, and I am very gratified that so many are valuing it. My deep goal is, of course, to get to the children. "Happier couples raise healthier kids." And this advice works with any kind of relationship. With your help the world is a little better, a little more connected, than when we found it. Thanks.

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I hope you are looking for love, a great relationship for yourself, and maybe eventually a durable marriage, or even just the skills to get along well with anyone, and ways to make the world a better place.  If you have, I’ve got lots of ideas to share with you. This page is one of the hubs from which to start your studies. There are several hundred articles on this site, and they ARE organized.  But people who come here are not so organized.  They often want just one answer to one question.  Well, some sample questions are below.  Some answers are in a fun article called Using My Logic. You can search for words or phrases in your question.  Google and other Search Engines seem to like me.  So try a search for “Al Turtle frustration” (your word or phrase) and see what happens.  Or maybe you want to have my view of Where to Start.  In any case, click on How to Use this Website to see the general structure and to start finding your way around.  Here are some specific topics:

One Liners that have helped me stay Dialogical

I can think of nothing as important as getting to be, and staying, Dialogical. It makes possible solutions to all the relationship troubles. This is the list of one line reminders that I have used over the past 15 years to remind me of "a better way of getting along." I often have had a piece of paper with one of these phrases on my wall (sometimes many walls) at home or in my office where I can see it every day. These are learning tools.

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The Road to Empathy: The Essay

How about it? Want to learn to be empathic? Want to know when you aren't? Want to improve? I believe that more and more people will be talking about the “need for more empathy.” I believe that the primary cause of conflict in our families, our partnerships, our business, our marriages, our political communities, our churches, and in the world, is a pronounced lack of reliable empathic skills.

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Combating Loneliness

A short essay on the new phenomenon of Living Alone.  Seems that this is preferable to being in a relationship where you feel alone.  If your partner feels alone, what can you do to change this and prevent it?  What can you do to not feel alone yourself?  What can you do to impress a new acquaintance that they won't have to feel alone – with you?

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Getting to Work

Work, Work!  In this article I want to share my view of the process of how to get a great relationship from the very widest perspective. I suggest that you read my paper on the Map of Relationship first, to prepare to  grasp this view.


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Where do you start? What goes first?

I often get asked this, and fortunately for me the answer is clear. But let's state the question more clearly. If I am in a couple, a relationship, what do I/we focus on first, second, third, etc. to make things better. Ok, here we go. The answer arises from two different major principles: the Anna Karenina Principle and the Biological Dream.

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Often Read Articles – Archive

In the meantime, here are some links to my more popular articles (in PDF format). What to do when he/she leaves Removing Resentments Power: Master/Slave, Power of Passivity, Passivity in the Foundations: Three Essays Boundaries for Individual: The Essay  Diversity: … Continue reading